Have you ever asked yourself how you got involved in certain relationships? Well, I have an answer for you. It is my strong belief that we operate from a place of lack, meaning that we are looking for a void to be filled. When one enters into a relationship as if they are in need of something, then he or she becomes vulnerable. Imagine for a moment that you are hungry and haven’t eaten for a couple of days. It is at that time that most of us fall and begin to settle for any type of food, in order satisfy the hunger.
The same is true in our relationships. The void, or the pain, of being alone overrides the logic and common sense that most of us have. The things that we said that we wouldn’t settle for, we now give a pass to. You said that you wanted someone who is a good communicator, however, you accepted someone who doesn’t communicate at all. You said you wanted someone who is family-oriented, but you accepted someone who doesn’t care about family values. You said you wanted someone who is gentle, yet you settled for a person who is rough and abusive. You said you wanted someone to love you, then, you accepted someone who has never been loved and is not equipped to love. The question we must ask is, “Am I willing to be honest with myself when it comes to my personal relationships?” I believe that the things that we are asking for from others are the very things that we must be.
So let me offer this solution: Spend time building a strong relationship with yourself. If you can’t make yourself happy, then you can rest assured that no one else can fill that void. So, what is the one thing that will fill your emptiness? Love of one’s self, my friend. Love.
My motto is this: Free yourself from yourself and you will find your true self . Don’t pretend to have it all together, work on having it all together.
L. D. Faison | Personal Development Coach