I often hear the expression from folks who say,” I am just doing me”. However, I am wondering if that is just an excuse not to work on one’s personal development. It reminds me of myself quite a few years ago. I was very manipulative and deceptive in my relationship practices. My tendency was to use women, and con others into thinking that I was a nice guy and that everything about me was intact. When challenged about some of my misdeeds, I would get defensive and respond with, “I am just doing me”. That was an excuse and a crutch I used instead of working on myself.
In the interim, I learned that I was pretending, and that I was unhappy with the person I claimed to be. At some point, the status quo of “I am just doing me” turned into personal development. I suppose that I was afraid of the pain and embarrassment that opening up to someone might cause. But I realize that the pain of saying “no” to counseling was even greater than the pain of saying “yes”.
Here is something else that I’ve learned. The majority of us who say that we are “just doing us” are not doing us at all. We’re doing our representative, or who we think we are, or maybe who we want to be. So, let me offer a solution in four parts:
- Be honest with yourself. (This is the most important step.)
- Write down your feelings. (Very therapeutic.)
- Seek wise counsel. (Talk to someone you trust.)
- Implement the principles you have learned. (Walk in your success!)
Remember, free yourself from yourself, and you become your true self.